Motivational Monday: Living With Anxiety.

Anxiety....not fun right?!

Personally, I've come very far with my anxiety. From avoiding large social situations to attending my company's annual event with over 25,000 people. It did not happen over night or quickly. Some people will not even understand what it is like to have and suffer from anxiety because there is such a vast difference from person to person.

Ever have one of those days...the ones that freeze you in your tracks? You start your morning off with an awesome to do list with a solid plan to kick butt but then....suddenly you cannot do anything. End up shutting down, binge eating, sleeping because your mind does not stop wandering?

This is something I hid for a very long time. Secretly, on my worst days, I thought I was losing my mind. Those sleepless nights, wasted days, extensive naps just to get my mind right... those days are not long gone but are few and father between.

For those who have never had to experience anxiety, it can be hard to describe. Personally, for me, it's those random pain staking moments that take my breathe away, that stop me in my tracks, that prevent me from accomplishing my goals. The internal fear....it starts raging, I start hearing that nagging person in my head with a million fears and worries screaming STOP you cannot do this... what are you doing?

My head goes one way when my body wants to go another and then I find myself thinking the worst, over analyzing everything and at times ruining wonderful opportunities because of self doubt. When one thing derails, changes, goes off course my head goes a million miles a minute and then I find myself somewhere, doing something without the ability to remember what I did when I started.

Then I find myself shutting down, angry at myself for not being able to control my thoughts and emotions requiring a serious attempt to calm myself down. When it intensifies, for hours which turns into days, then it goes from being anxious to being depressed. This is when the self doubt rages and the breakdown that sometimes feels inevitable. This phase is when you find me becoming more reserved, stepping back from social gatherings, absent in my conversations because the feeling of being alone becomes to the point that I feel like I am drowning. Even in a room full of the most wonderful people, on my bad days....I still feel alone.

Finding a healthy balance for handling my anxiety and depression has been a number one priority for myself over this last year. For a long time, I would do a different activity, join a new class, meditate, read a book....but then life happened and my views on handling this went from a simple act to a complete overhaul. Unfortunately, there is no magic pill or quick fix on the worst days because the next day...or days after you start to feel light again you have to realize this is not something you can just ignore or handle at it's worst.

The habits I had developed from not properly handling my anxiety and depression truly started to affect me in all aspects of my life. From not sleeping for days at a time, to requiring extensive naps to recuperate on the weekends, my health and lifestyle was completely out of whack. It was time to stop taking my irritability out on others and stop blaming myself for my anxiety.

First, it took realizing that some people do not understand what it is like to struggle with this and even though it looks like we may have it all together on the surface, inside things can be crumbling. Some people will say negative things like "you're crazy," or "you just need to calm down" but they just do not understand what it is like to drown in your own thoughts in your head. Patience is something I have had to learn and embrace with others and myself.

Second, be aware of what triggers your anxiety and depression...those moments are signs for you to see where you start to derail and require more patience and self reflection. These are the times that we have to step back and assess what is happening so that we know when we need space and when we need to ask for help.

Third, finding healthier ways to handle those moments when you start to feel like you are losing control is incredibly helpful for you and your loved ones. Personally, for me, I found that sweating out my worst moments enabled me to not only reset my mind but learn about the true strength I possessed. To be able to conquer your anxious moment, and then be able to do something of a positive nature starts a new mental mapping. It shows you that even though you feel out of control you are able to define what you need.

There is no one answer for everyone, there is no quick fix, and some days you are not able to handle it the same way you did during a previous attack. But just know that you are real and fragile and deserve wonderful things. Quick tips that have improved my anxiety:

1. Getting adequate sleep-that means turning off the electronics, putting down my work computer even if I am not done for the day
2. De-clutter my head-that means writing down all of my thoughts positive and negative, brain dumping is helpful to write it out, leave it on paper and move forward.
3. Eat right-food and anxiety have a direct correlation. When I have eat more processed foods, increased caffeine or went too long without eating my anxiety always worsens.
4. Pay It Forward- doing something positive for others is a wonderful way to spread positivity in a negative situation. From smiling, to opening a door it can be that simple.
5. Meditation-the hardest thing for me but is incredibly helpful to lay on my yoga mat, calm my nerves and focus solely on my breathing
6. Silence- sometimes even if that means leaving a social event, stepping outside or ultimately going home silence can be helpful to disconnect. It is okay to need time alone.
7. Goal Boards- When I am especially anxious about finances, having goal boards helps to visualize my daily activities to focus on potential
8. Have Fun- some days that means kayaking, surfing, or coloring...doing fun activities (sun is always a bonus)
9. Give yourself time to worry- If I try to ignore everything that triggers my anxiety then it worsens. So it can be helpful to set a timer and allow yourself to worry and then when the timer stops.... move forward.
10. Make a list- give yourself a list daily to follow. I schedule out my entire day and it enables me to cross off events which makes me feel happier to be accomplished.

Hoping my tips helps you to live a healthier more fulfilled life. Would you like more tips on clean eating and personal development? My free group starts NEXT MONDAY! Just comment or personally email me at ginamariefit@gmail.com and I will gladly add you into my group!